First and foremost, if you have been a frequent reader of MinutePsychology, we would like to take this opportunity to Thank you for taking an interest in our little endeavor and showing us your support throughout the past many months (we’re close to one year-old now).
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爱是一种深刻的感觉，这种深刻的感觉参杂了甜蜜和痛苦，它可以是具体的爱情，也可以是莫名的无奈和宿命。
他的缺点，其实你比任何人都清楚。
你们不适合的地方，你同样比别人清楚。
当别人不能明白你为何会喜欢上这样的一个人时，你清楚知道是那份深刻的感觉让你肯定了自己对他的爱，因为你知道这样的感觉不容易发生在你和其他人身上。
当别人纳闷你为什么还可以和对方继续交往的同时，其实你自己是非常清楚的，因为你摆脱不了的正是这些深刻的感觉。
一段甜蜜比痛苦来得多的感情，快乐肯定比不快乐来得多。相对的，当一段感情痛苦比甜蜜多，不快乐自然比快乐多。
但，无论快乐还是不快乐，这些感觉仍然深刻，仍然是当事人放不下这段感情的真正因素。
我们常常以为痛苦和不快乐会让原本相爱的人分开，实际上，当一个人和另一个人有过太多深刻的感觉，他们是不容易分开的，哪怕这些深刻的感觉叫人痛苦不堪。
因为深刻的感觉的感觉验证了一段感情的存在。
所有的情感都曾在甜蜜和痛苦中挣扎，越挣扎就越深刻，越深刻就越难以释怀。所以当一个人在取舍一段感情的时候，对方的优点和缺点，适合与否往往不是主要的关键，感觉才是最首要的。
所以，要怎样确定一个人的感情呢？要怎样断定一个人是否仍然爱着另一个人。只要回忆你和他相处的每个细节，他的一举一动是否仍然深刻牵动着你此刻的情绪，这样的感觉越是深刻，就越难把这个人排出自己的生活。
要放下一段没有挣扎的感觉是容易的，要放下一段深刻的感情却是困难的。因为你首先要放下的是哪些深刻的记忆。。。。。。
文：如意航 [原文曾刊登于2000年“希望空间”系列五]

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